LGBTs in Black History Month

February is Black History Month, which means it's also the month to celebrate black LGBT folks in history. Check out BlackedOUT History:

"LGBTQ Black folks have been major contributors to society and social justice movements for hundreds of years! From the famous scientist George Washington Carver to the legendary blues singer Ma Rainey – LGBTQ Black figures have made long-lasting contributions and have had a significant influence on U.S. culture. It is important for GSAs to celebrate the contributions of Black LGBTQ people and to advocate for the visibility of these important historical figures. Recognizing how interconnected our oppressions are makes our movements stronger.

One way GSA clubs do this is by celebrating Black History Month every February. If your school has no Black History Month celebration, organize with your GSA to start an official commemoration at your school. Work with administration and staff, student groups, and others to ensure the lives of LGBTQ Black historical figures are included in your school’s activities.

Here are some helpful ideas of activities you can do at your school during Black History Month:

Teach Your School!

• Create a PowerPoint presentation highlighting important Black LGBTQ leaders and present it to your classes. Make sure to include leaders that are not as well known. You can do your presentations in ALL of your classes because LGBTQ Black folks have made contributions in EVERY subject including music, literature, art, science, health and more.
• Train your social studies and English teachers on Black LGBTQ authors and historical figures and suggest ways they could incorporate them and their biographies into their lessons.
• Work with your school librarian or administration to make sure there is a Black History display board that includes LGBTQ people, as well as books by important authors like Langston Hughes and Lorraine Hansberry.
• Organize with other student clubs, such as the Black Student Union, to make sure the month’s activities include LGBTQ leaders. To learn more about building successful coalitions, see our resource Coalition Building.
• Invite speakers to your school who can talk about LGBTQ Black history.
• Organize discussions on the current events related to LGBTQ Black folks that demonstrate how homophobia, transphobia, and racism affect their lives today.
• Highlight local LGBTQ Black people who have given back to your community.
• Screen a film like Brother Outsider, which documents the life of Civil Rights leader Bayard Rustin.

Be Creative!

• Organize a poster art campaign or contest featuring LGBTQ Black historical figures. Create a display of pictures and biographies. You can find a list of some of these leaders at our BlackedOUT History page on GSA Network’s website.
• Create an LGBTQ Black History Timeline and display it in your school.
• Use your school’s public announcements to share stories! Play sound clips from legendary blues singers Ma Rainey and Bessie Smith. Read poetry from Audre Lorde and Countee Cullen, or read selections of important speeches by Bayard Rustin.

Use Social Media!

• Highlight important figures via your GSA’s social networking sites like Facebook, Myspace, and Twitter. Make videos, post photos, tweet, and even make a Facebook or Wiki page for your favorite icon.
• Learn about and celebrate the LGBTQ Black art of voguing! Host a workshop, watch videos online as a group, and research the history of this dance art.

Remember that having one month of commemoration of the lives of LGBTQ Black people is just the beginning! Have ongoing conversations with your GSA about why it’s important to acknowledge and celebrate the contributions of LGBTQ people of color to society and to social justice movements and why it’s important to build an anti-racist GSA. For more information, see our resource Building Anti Racist GSAs.

Most of all, have fun learning, teaching and celebrating some of our most important LGBTQ leaders and community members in history!

LGBTQ Black Historical Figures

Name	Date-of-Birth Date-of-Death	Profession	Quote
Alvin Ailey Jr.	Jan. 5, 1931 Dec. 1, 1989	Choreographer	“I am trying to show the world that we are all human beings and that color is not important. What is important is the quality of our work.”
John Amaechi	Nov. 26, 1970	Pro Basketball Player	“I am gay, black, British…and I am now asserting my activism.”
James Baldwin	Aug. 2, 1924 Nov. 30, 1987	Author	"I love America more than any other country in the world and, exactly for this reason, I insist on the right to criticize her perpetually."
Josephine Baker	June 3, 1906 Apr. 12, 1975	Singer and Dancer	“Surely the day will come when color means nothing more than the skin tone, when religion is seen uniquely as a way to speak one's soul; when birth places have the weight of a throw of the dice and all men are born free, when understanding breeds love and brotherhood.”
Jean-Michel Basquiat	Dec. 22, 1960 Aug. 12, 1988	Graffiti Artist	"SAMO© as an end to mindwash religion, nowhere politics, and bogus philosophy"
Gladys Bentley	Aug. 12, 1907 Jan. 18, 1960	Blues Singer
Octavia Butler	June 22, 1947 Feb. 26, 2006	Author	"People have the right to call themselves whatever they like. That doesn't bother me. It's other people doing the calling that bothers me."
George Washington Carver	July 12, 1864 Jan. 5, 1943	Scientist	“Where there is no vision, there is no hope.”
RuPaul Andre Charles	Nov. 17, 1960	Actor, Dancer and TV Show Host	“What other people think of me is not my business. What I do is what I do. How people see me doesn’t change what I decide to do. I don’t choose projects so people don’t see me as one thing or another. I choose projects that excite me. I think the problem is that people refuse to understand what drag is outside of their own belief system.”
Countee Cullen	May 30, 1903 Jan. 9, 1946	Poet	“My poetry, I think, has become the way of my giving out what music is within me.”
Lee Daniels	Dec. 24, 1959	Film Director
Angela Davis	Jan. 26, 1944	Civil Rights Activist	“Revolution is a serious thing, the most serious thing about a revolutionary's life. When one commits oneself to the struggle, it must be for a lifetime.”
Ruth Ellis	July 23, 1899 Oct. 5, 2000	Activist	“I never expected I’d be 100 years old. It didn’t even come to my mind.”
Sharon Farmer	June 10, 1951	White House Photographer	“Never turn down a chance to show what you can do.”
Peter Gomes	May 22, 1942	Theologian	“There can be no light without the darkness out of which it shines.”
Mabel Hampton	May 2, 1902 Oct. 26, 1989	Lesbian Pioneer	"I, Mabel Hampton, have been a lesbian all my life, for eighty-two years, and I am proud of myself and my people. I would like all my people to be free in this country and all over the world, my gay people and my black people."
Lorraine Hansberry	May 19, 1930 Jan. 12, 1965	Author and Playwright	“All real and lasting change starts first on the inside and works it way through to the outside. Politically speaking, each person being the change we wish to see in the world is the only stance that can make a lasting difference. Indeed, it's the only thing that ever has.”
E.Lynn Harris	June 20, 1955 July 23, 2009	Author	“I want people to know they don’t have to live their lives in a permanent ‘Don’t Ask, Don’t Tell’ existence. Truth is a powerful tool.”
Sherry Harris	Feb. 27, 1965	Politician	“All real and lasting change starts first on the inside and works it way through to the outside. Politically speaking, each person being the change we wish to see in the world is the only stance that can make a lasting difference. Indeed, it's the only thing that ever has.”
Billie Holiday	Apr. 7, 1915 July 17, 1959	Singer	"A kiss that is never tasted, is forever and ever wasted."
Langston Hughes	Feb. 1, 1902 May 22, 1967	Poet	“Hold fast to dreams, For if dreams die, Life is a broken-winged bird that cannot fly, Hold fast to dreams, For if dreams go, Life is a barren field, Frozen with snow."
Zora Neale Hurston	Jan. 7, 1891 Jan. 28, 1960	Author and Folklorist	“Mama exhorted her children at every opportunity to ‘jump at de sun.’ We might not land on the sun, but at least we would get off the ground.”
Bill T. Jones	Feb. 15, 1952	Dancer and Choreographer	"Living and dying is not the big issue. The big issue is what you’re going to do with your time while you are here."
Representative Barbara Jordan (D-Texas)	Feb. 21, 1936 Jan. 17, 1996	Politician	"My faith in the Constitution is whole, it is complete, it is total. I am not going to sit here and be an idle spectator to the diminution, the subversion, the destruction of the Constitution."
Audre Lorde	Feb. 18, 1934 Nov. 17, 1992	Author	“When I dare to be powerful, to use my strength in the service of my vision, then it becomes less and less important whether I am afraid.”
Marsha P. Johnson	1945 July 6, 1992	Transgender Activist and co-founder of S.T.A.R.	When asked what the P stood for in her name, she replied "Pay it No Mind."
June Jordan	July 9, 1936 June 14, 2002	Activist, Poet, Teacher	"Bisexuality means I am free and I am as likely to want to love a woman as I am likely to want to love a man, and what about that? Isn't that what freedom implies?"
Miss Major	Unknown	Transgender, Public Health and Prison Activist
Gertrude "Ma" Rainey	Apr. 26, 1886 Dec. 22, 1939	Singer	"Went out last night with a crowd of my friends, They must have been women, 'cause I don't like no men. Wear my clothes just like a fan, Talk to gals just like any old man 'Cause they say I do it, ain't nobody caught me, Sure got to prove it on me."
Bayard Rustin	Mar. 17, 1910 Aug. 24, 1987	Civil Rights Activist	"We are all one. And if we don't know it, we will learn it the hard way."
Bessie Smith	Unknown July 1892 Sept. 26, 1937	Singer	“It's a long old road, but I know I'm gonna find the end.”
Sheryl Swoopes	Mar. 25, 1971	WNBA Player	"No matter how far life pushes you down, no matter how much you hurt, you can always bounce back."
Wanda Sykes	Mar. 7, 1964	Comedian	"If you feel like there's something out there that you're supposed to be doing, if you have a passion for it, then stop wishing and just do it."
André Leon Talley	Oct. 16,1949	Fashion Editor	“It's not about canceling shows, but initiating things on an individual level. When much is given to you, much is expected. If you're an honest American, you can't wake up and not be affected by the neglect of the government after Katrina. You can't be an honest American and not think about it every day.”
Alice Walker	Feb. 9, 1944	Author and Feminist	“The truest and most enduring impulse I have is simply to write.”
Phill Wilson	Apr. 29, 1956	AIDS Activist	"The price of the ticket for life is to leave the world in a different place than you found it, to leave the world a better place than you found it."
Jacqueline Woodson	Feb. 12, 1963	Author	“I think it's important that everyday we think about the work we need to do to make this world a better place. I mean, we should wake up thinking about it and go to bed thinking about tomorrow's tasks. There's an awful lot of change needing to be made around here.”

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Black LGBTQI History Timeline

by In Our Own Words Project

1782: Deborah Sampson disguises herself as a male and enlists in the Continental forces under the name of Robert Shurtleff. Sampson’s gender is discovered when she is hospitalized for wounds suffered in battle near Tarrytown, NY. Some historians believe that Deborah Sampson was African American.

1790: George Middleton, leader of The Bucks of America, an all-black Revolutionary War regiment, and Louis Clapion, a French mulatto hairdresser build and live together in the oldest standing house on Beacon Hill, at 5 Pinckney St.

1860: Edmonia Lewis, African American/Native American sculptor, known for her masculine dress, studies and works in Boston. It was in Boston that she meets the group of feminists and artists, headed by actress Charlotte Cushman, with whom she is to live for several years in Rome.

1880: Angelina Weld Grimke, (often confused with her famous aunt, the white abolitionist Angelina Grimke Weld), is born in Boston into a distinguished biracial family. Grimke becomes a teacher and a poet of the Harlem Renaissance. Her love poems are written to women. “…Oh Mamie, if you only knew how my heart beats when I think of you, and it yearns and pants to gaze– if only for one second– upon your lovely face.”

1920: An artistic movement in New York that becomes known as the Harlem Renaissance...

To see a full timeline, visit In Our Own Words by the Metropolitan Community Churches.

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More Resources!

• More Black LGBTQ Historical Figures courtesy of the University of Delaware.
• More Black LGBTQ Current and Historical Figures courtesy of AOL.
• Black LGBTQ History Timeline.
• Equality Forum also has a website, called The GLBT History Month, which highlights LGBTQ figures.
• Build coalitions in your school.
• Make your GSA an anti-racist GSA.
• Have a visibility campaign at your school.

Photo of Bayard Rustin with School Children: Courtesy of Getty Images

Photo of Bayard Rustin Teaching: Courtesy of Bayard Rustin Film Project"

What About The Children? National Adoption Month!

My partner and I adopted our son through the foster care system here in North Carolina, so today's blog topic is a big deal to me.

November is National Adoption Month, celebrated throughout the United States in an effort to finalize adoptions from foster care, and to celebrate all adoptive families. (National Adoption Day falls on November 20 this year, the Saturday before Thanksgiving).

This year's National Adoption Month initiative targets adoption professionals by focusing on ways to recruit and retain parents for the 115,000 children and youth in foster care waiting for adoptive families. The National Adoption Month poster (PDF - 3569 KB) notes strategies adoption professionals can implement any day, week, or month to benefit children waiting for families. The Spanish National Adoption Month poster (PDF - 3599 KB) also provides suggestions for working with Spanish-speaking families throughout the year.

Now is a great time for LGBT folks to adopt, and the foster care system is a great place to look for kids who need homes and parents.

Thousands of children in North Carolina enter the foster care system each year, and range in age from infants to 18 years old. All foster children have unique backgrounds, experiences, personalities, strengths, and needs.

The NC foster care system is open to gay parents. (OK, well, technically, they're neither open nor not open.) Your actual experience will depend on any foster care agency you go through and/or the officials in any county DSS (Department of Social Services) that you deal with. We found everyone we interacted with to be extremely positive and supportive of us as a gay male couple looking to adopt - all they cared about was being sure that the kids in need found a good, loving home that could support and care for them.

During November, there are plenty of things you can do to observe National Adoption Month, either as a parent, prospective parent, or someone who has no plans to have children but wants to support adoptive families. Some ideas for this month include:

☼ Write down your family story and add it to a scrapbook.

☼ Contact your local paper about National Adoption Month, and ask them to publish a positive story about adoption.

☼ Contact a children's organization or foster care agency and ask how you can help.

☼ Create your family tree. Complete one about your child's birth family (if information is known) as well as your adoptive family.

☼ If you have one, ask your place of worship to offer a special prayer for children in foster care waiting for adoption.

☼ Watch a movie with an adoption theme.

☼ Donate books about adoption to your local or school library.

There are already thousands of children out there who need homes, and foster care and adoption are great ways to form your family.

(And if you're thinking about having kids or are already a parent, the Family Equality Council is a great resource.)

Adoption is a great way to make a positive impact in a kid's life, and it's also an investment in the future for yourself, LGBT folks, the country, and society as a whole.

It's easy to think that you won't be a good parent, but I can guarantee you that having you as a parent will be hundreds of times better than having no parent at all.

Come Out, Come Out, Wherever You Are! National Coming Out Day.

October 11 is National Coming Out Day when people of all sexual orientations are encouraged to come out and live openly.

(Obviously this has more significance for LGBT folks, but straight allies are included in this. Sometimes in predominantly gay situations it can be difficult for straight folks to admit to being not gay. The whole point is one of acceptance for everyone and acknowledgment of our diversity.)

(And Ally Week is coming up, Oct 18-22, BTW!)

While being gay doesn't have quite the stigma it used to, there still isn't true acceptance and equality. And considering how hard it can be to be gay today, it's that much harder to be bi, or trans, or even LGBT within another minority group like people of color. It can be hard to be unsure and questioning, wondering about your sexuality.

Coming out is a process, and there is no right or wrong way to do it. It's a wholly personal thing, and it can be a lifelong process. It's also a continuum - you may be out to your family, but you may be closeted at work, or at the gym, or at your kid's school, or standing in line at the bank.

The most important thing is to take a step today, in a conscious way. Do something that feels safe to you, but still do something to come or be out of the closet, or even just give some more visibility to all or part of the community. You can talk about your partner, the gay contestant on a reality show, the HIV/AIDS epidemic, your going to Pride, your BDSM leather club, or whatever!

Sexual orientation and gender identity are aspects of who we are, but they do not completely define us. Still, the only way to make progress is to be honest - prejudice and bigotry are based in ignorance, and the more of that we can take away, the less discrimination there will be.

Coming Out Day is actually celebrated internationally. In the US, HRC provides many resources and activities. Here's a handy map for organized events:

View these events on a larger map »

And here are some resources:

• A Resource Guide to Coming Out
• A Straight Guide to GLBT Americans
• Coming Out as Transgender
• Resource Guide to Coming Out for African Americans
• Guía de Recursos Para Salir Del Clóset
• Living Openly in Your Place of Worship

Whoever you are, wherever you are, come out!

DADT-ism

The federal 'Don't Ask, Don't Tell' policy, which prohibits LGBT folks from serving openly and honestly in the nation's military, is filled with bigotry and prejudice.

I don't mean it's homophobic, which is obvious and the policy's entire point. Instead, I'm referring to it's presumably unintended consequences of racism and sexism.

The Service Women's Action Network (SWAN), an organization dedicated to helping women servicemembers and vets, has produced a great fact sheet (PDF) on these discriminatory effects of DADT.

SWAN has publicly opposed DADT since its inception, arguing that not only is it discriminatory, but it also plays into the hands of racists, misogynists, and homo/transpobes. They also argue that it can be used as a blackmail tool by sexual predators in the military who threaten to use it to blackmail servicefolks.

According to their fact sheet:

DADT disproportionately affects women. Although women made up 15% of the armed forces in 2008, 34% of service members discharged were women. The impact of DADT on women varies according to service branch. For example, women comprised only 20% of the Air Force yet made up 62% of Air Force discharges. Racial minorities are also disproportionately affected by Don’t Ask, Don’t Tell. Non-white active duty service members represent 29.4% of the total military population, but comprise 45% of all DADT discharges in 2008. Service Branch/Percent Women Discharged Under DADT/Percent Women Serving in Branch:

• Army 36% 14%
• Navy 23% 15%
• Marine Corps 18% 6%
• Air Force 62% 20%

Race/Ethnic Group Percent discharged under DADT:

• White (non-Hispanic) 55%
• Black 20%
• Hispanic 9%
• Asian/Pacific Islander 8%
• American Indian 3%
• Other/Unknown 5%

Note the huge disproportions between the representative populations and the discharge percentages. Obviously women and racial minorities are being targeted under this policy, either expressly or subliminally.

SWAN also notes:

In addition to being formally excluded from the military, LGBT service members also endure informal discriminatory treatment from their peers and superiors in the military. Service members suspected of homosexuality are frequently harassed, mocked, and generally experience hostile treatment based on their real or perceived sexual orientation.

Women are especially vulnerable to so-called lesbian baiting, defined as “the practice of pressuring women for sex and sexually harassing women by using the threat of calling them lesbians as a means of intimidation.” Women in the military who do not conform to gender stereotypes or refuse to engage in sexual activity with men are at risk of being labeled a lesbian. Some of the increased scrutiny of service women’s sexuality is undoubtedly the result of women’s hyper-visibility in the military, along with the attitude that women do not belong in service.

Transgender individuals also endure many forms of exclusion in the military. In the first place, individuals who have undergone genital surgery in order to change their gender may be denied the opportunity to serve in the military at all. Furthermore, individuals diagnosed with “gender identity disorder” are barred from serving in the military, which effectively excludes most open transgender individuals. They are subject to harassment, hostile treatment, and are generally unwelcome in the military. Also, even though transgender servicememers are not necessarily gay, lesbian, or bisexual, they may be assumed to be and thus targeted under DADT.

A new poll commissioned by The Vet Voice Foundation and conducted jointly by Republican and Democratic pollsters finds that most veterans are “comfortable around gay and lesbian people, believe that being gay or lesbian has no bearing on a service member’s ability to perform their duties, and would find it acceptable if gay and lesbian people were allowed to serve openly in the military."

Obviously it's time - past time! - the United States ditches the failed DADT policy, which not only prevents LGBT servicemembers from serving honestly with honor and dignity, but also fosters other bigotries and stereotypes.

Our servicefolks deserve better, and so does our country.

Take Action! Supporting Health Care Reform As An LGBT Issue

With all of the talk of national health care reform, not much attention is being given to one fact: this is an LGBT issue, and the proposed reforms have a lot of gay-positive aspects to them.

Did you know that the bill being voted on by Congress this week - Patient Protection and Affordable Care Act (H.R. 3590) - includes:

• Improved data collection for at-risk groups (still a bit vague, but with continued lobbying, this will likely include sexual orientation and gender identity demographic categories)
• Nondiscrimination on the basis of sexual orientation and gender identity in federal grants for mental health education and training
• $8.5 billion in funds for community health centers, including LGBT health community centers

This is in addition to:

• Prohibition of insurance exclusions based on pre-existing conditions
• Extension of insurance coverage to approximately 31 million uninsured people

... which will affect thousands of LGBT folks and their families.

LGBT people are often under- and uninsured, and also fall into a number of other at-risk populations, including seniors and youth, women, people of color, immigrants, and people living with HIV/AIDS.

These at-risk groups face extreme discrimination by both insurance companies and by health care providers and are denied the care they need. Even more egregious, in 2007, 50% of our tax dollars were invested in public health expenses in the USA with only 5% of the population receiving treatment, leaving an estimated 45,000 people to die because they simply lacked affordable insurance coverage.

Take action now thorough PFLAG's action alert: tell your representative to pass health reform today!

Access to competent and affordable healthcare is out of reach for far too many of our LGBT loved ones, but we can change it.

Individual Health Care Reform

Now, this may come as a shock, but LGBT folks don't get as good of service from the medical community as others.

Obviously this isn't really a surprise, but the specific data on this phenomenon may be.

Lambda Legal has released a free report on this, "When Health Care Isn't Caring."

This survey is the first one to examine the issue on a national scale. It documents refusal of care and barriers to health care among LGBT and HIV communities. The hope is to use these data to raise awareness of this issue and to influence decisions being made about how health care is delivered in the future.

Some of the key findings include:

• More than half of all respondents reported that they have experienced at least one of the following types of discrimination in care:
  = being refused needed care
  = health care professionals refusing to touch them or using excessive precautions
  = health care professionals using harsh or abusive language
  = being blamed for their health status
  = health care professionals being physically rough or abusive

• Almost 56 percent of lesbian, gay, and bisexual respondents had at least one of these experiences; 70 percent of transgender and gender-nonconforming respondents had one or more of these experiences; and nearly 63 percent of HIV+ respondents experienced one or more of these types of discrimination in health care.
• Almost 8 percent of LGB respondents reported that they had been denied needed health care outright. Just under 27% of all transgender and gender-nonconforming respondents reported being denied care. Finally, 19 percent of respondents living with HIV also reported being denied care.
• Just over 10 percent of LGB respondents reported that health care professionals used harsh language toward them; 11 percent reported that health professionals refused to touch them or used excessive precautions; and more than 12 percent of LGB respondents reported being blamed for their health status.
• Almost 36 percent of HIV+ respondents reported that health care professionals refused to touch them or used excessive precautions and nearly 26 percent were blamed for their own health status.
• Nearly 21 percent of transgender and gender-nonconforming respondents reported being subjected to harsh or abusive language from a health care professional, and almost 8 percent reported experiencing physically rough or abusive treatment from a health care professional. Over 20 percent of transgender and gender-nonconforming respondents reported being blamed for their own health conditions.

Not all discrimination is equal, though.

In almost every category measured in this survey, transgender and gender-nonconforming respondents reported experiencing the highest rates of discrimination and barriers to care. Transgender and gender-nonconforming respondents reported facing barriers and discrimination as much as two to three times more frequently than lesbian, gay, and bisexual respondents.

In nearly every category, a higher proportion of respondents who are people of color and/or low-income reported experiencing discriminatory and substandard care.

Respondents reported a high degree of anticipation and belief that they would face discriminatory care and such concerns were a barrier to seeking care. Overall, 9 percent of LGB respondents are concerned about being refused medical services when they need them, and 20 percent of HIV+ respondents and over half of transgender and gender-nonconforming respondents share this same concern.

Even worse, the survey respondents had higher proportions of people with advanced degrees, higher household incomes, and better health insurance coverage than the LGBT community in general. Since these factors tend to improve access to care, this means the report likely understates the barriers to health care experienced by all LGBT people and those living with HIV.

Things that people can do to improve the conditions documented by this survey include:

• Educate themselves and health care providers about the rights and needs of LGBT and HIV+ patients.
• Advocate for improved laws and policies.
• Use existing mechanisms that are appropriate, such as medical powers of attorney and other legal documents, to create as much protection as possible for themselves and their loved ones.
• Fight back when discrimination occurs, including reporting discriminatory practices, sharing stories, and contacting advocacy organizations and/or attorneys.
  

The report is a tough read, but it has a lot of good information. You have to identify the problem before you can fix it, and this report does an excellent job of chronicling many of the issues in health care.

Post-Valentine's: Whoopi for Marriage Equality, Just The Facts, Binational Couples

This year, Freedom to Marry Week wrapped up on Valentine's weekend.

Ironically, this weekend thousands of couples chose to tie the knot by entering into civil marriage, but of course, here in North Carolina, none of them were gay.

Many gay couples did indeed celebrate their love, but they weren't able to take part in any of the more than 1,000 rights given by civil marriage.

Still, the marriage equality movement is advancing. A couple of decades ago, it was unthinkable that gay couples would get married, and now we have five states (with D.C. pending) that treat LGBT couples like all other citizens.

Here are three things to note with regard to couple equality:

1)
The conversation around marriage equality is first and foremost about real families, real couples, and real children, who need and deserve the security, clarity, and respect that comes with marriage.

In honor of black history month, the Freedom To Marry Coalition has produced a high-profile list of 10 African-Americans Who Support the Freedom to Marry. You'll recognize the names, and you'll be impressed.

2)

Marriage Equality: Facts and Resources

(Crossposted from Gideon Alper's fantastic Gay Couples Law Blog on 1/18/10.)

Statistics and facts for same-sex marriage can be hard to find. Marriage equality is in the news a lot, but a lot of people just want unbiased information before deciding how they feel about it.

Here's what you need to know:

Support

Latest statistics:

• 41% support marriage equality for gay couples
  
• 49% oppose it
• 10% say it depends/are unsure

Historical trend of increasing support:

• Public support for marriage equality has increased about 1% annually over the last two decades.
• Statisticians predict a majority of Americans will support marriage equality by 2012.

Marriage Laws

Places Where Gay Couples Can Legally Get Married:

• Massachusetts (2004)
• Connecticut (2008)
• Iowa (2009)
• Vermont (2009)
• New Hampshire (2010)
• Washington, D.C. (Coming in March 2010)

Places Where Gay Couples Married In Other Places Are Recognized:

• New York
• California (but only if you got married before Proposition 8 passed)

Demographics

The most recent census did not count marriages gay couples directly, so the following are estimates based on how people reported their household. It counts households with 2 members of the same sex that are unrelated.

• Total Number of Gay Couples: 594,391
• Number of People in a Couple: 1.2 Million
• State With the Most Couples: California (92,138)
• State With the Least Couples: North Dakota (703)
• Highest Concentration of Gay Couple (% of all couples): Washington, D.C. (1.29%)
• Lowest Concentration of Gay Couples (% of all couples): North and South Dakota (.22%)

Gay people make up 1-4% of the population in most cities, but are more concentrated [PDF] in metropolitan areas.

Highest Number of Same-Sex Couples:

1. New York, NY: 47,000
2. Los Angeles, CA: 12,000
3. Chicago, IL: 10,000

Highest Concentration of Gay People:

1. San Francisco, CA: 15.4%
2. Seattle, WA: 12.9%
3. Atlanta, GA: 12.8%

Lowest Concentration of Gay People:

1. Detroit, MI: 1.5%
2. Richmond, VA: 3.4%
3. Cleveland, OH and Memphis, TN: 3.5%

Resources

State by State Map of Gay Marriage Laws. The Wall Street Journal compiled information from the Human Rights Campaign, the National Conference of State Legislatures, and other sources, to compile a user-friendly interactive map.

Text of State Constitutional Amendments Targeting Same-Sex Marriage. If you're one of those people who wants to read the laws themselves to see how exactly gay marriage is outlawed, check out this collection put together by Lambda Legal.

Year 2000 Census Information on Same Sex Households. Expect these numbers to increase in 2010 more than other types of families. The 2010 census will be the first to let gay couples report as married.

3)
Immigration Equality premiered a new video on Valentine's Day at the Huffington Post.

This video highlights the plight of binational same-sex couples who cannot get married. In a straight couple, the US partner can sponsor the other for residency. LGBT couples do not have that option, which means the non-US partner can be targeted for discrimination and kicked out of the country.

There are 36,000 lesbian and gay binational families in the United States, and half of those are also raising young children.

According to Rachel B. Tiven, Immigration Equality's executive director, "For every day that passes without action from Congress, another family faces separation and another child is put in jeopardy of losing a parent."

The Love That Dare Not Speak Its Name, i.e., LGBT love, has come a long way, but there's still some distance to travel. Eventually it'll be The Love Where LGBT Couples Get The Same Rights As Straight Couples, then the Love Whose Children's Get The Same Legal Protections.

Finally, ultimately, it'll all just be Love. And that's what Valentine's Day - and Freedom To Marry Week - is all about.

A March Through History

Thanks to Brant, our Triad Organizing Intern, for this piece.

This Monday, February 1st, despite the recent weather and some too-tight snow boots, I had the pleasure of participating in the silent march from North Carolina Agricultural and Technical State University (A&T) to downtown Greensboro to commemorate the 50th Anniversary of the Greensboro Sit-Ins. These sit-ins took place beginning on February 1st, 1960 at a ‘Whites Only’ lunch counter at a Woolworth’s in downtown Greensboro when four freshman students from A&T ordered coffee at this counter, and refused to leave. Their bravery and determination truly sparked change in the South during this troubled, unjust time, and today they are heroes.

The march started on A&T's campus, at the February One statue, a beautiful monument commemorating the sit-ins and these four students. There were several speeches before the march began, and a large crowd, and small speakers that were unfortunately pointed away from where I stood, so I heard little. When the march began, we were reminded that this was a silent march, to encourage reflection, and at that, we left.

We marched down the same path that the A&T Four took. We marched in rows of eight. We were silent. Nobody spoke, but the sun was shining between days of poor weather, and there was a feeling that had been sparked and that the sun kept warm and alive. A joy. A gratitude, really. It shone above our heads and from downtown, in the horizon, and lead us forward. It rose from the ground, its warmth penetrating the frozen land, carrying us. I felt this as I walked in the same footsteps as these four courageous men, to whom their future was uncertain.

It only took about 25 minutes, and we arrived (with much boisterousness and jubilation, I may add) at Governmental Plaza, just behind the renovated Woolworth's, which is now the International Civil Rights Center and Museum. (Unfortunately, the museum was sold out for the day, since February 1st also marked its grand opening, so I did not have the chance to see the inside.) Here, the people convened and heard the speeches of many members of the community, mostly student leaders from the colleges and universities in the Triad area. First was the President of the A&T's Student Government. His speech was brief, but he encouraged all of us to fight for what we believe in, no matter how it marginalizes us, for this is typically the price of activism. His speech was universal and important, for it was all-inclusive, and we were a large, diverse crowd. Similar speeches were given by the Student Government Presidents and students of other HBCUs, colleges, and universities in North Carolina and the Triad. One student from Greensboro College remarked his mother's insistence that while in high school, his receiving average grades was unacceptable, as his race is not average, but above-average, and does above-average things. This statement was particularly moving, as it really highlighted the activism encouraged by the speakers. Nobody who strives for change can claim they are average, or that their peers are average, or that they are fighting average fights. It is all for great change, and in the name of greatness, to secure great, bright futures for us all.

The student speakers concluded with a spoken word performance that is really beyond description. The words were beautiful, eloquent, and powerful. The voices were strong and conveyed feelings that really shook me. The performance of this writing and the raw energy behind it was truly sensational, and did a great job of summarizing everything I, and the people around me, I am sure, felt during this event. It was very inspirational for someone working towards equality and who looks back at the Civil Rights Movement in awe and with great respect.

As A&T's Student Government President put it, I must "sit in for something." For something about which I am passionate. For something in which I really believe. For something that will guarantee an equal and just future for myself and for my peers. This day not only reminded me of the power of a single person, but of the undeniable strength in unity and solidarity, working towards which I am more certain every day is my life's work.

-Brant Miller

An International Issue: LGBT Couples

Happy MLK Day, All!

Please take a moment today to reflect on the efforts of Rev. Dr. Martin Luther King, Jr., including not just his great work for racial justice but also what he did for social justice.

He said, "The revolution for human rights is opening up unhealthy areas in American life and permitting a new and wholesome healing to take place. Eventually the civil rights movement will have contributed infinitely more to the nation than the eradication of racial injustice. It will have enlarged the concept of brotherhood to a vision of total interrelatedness."

Also, let's not forget that one of his main advisors, Bayard Rustin, was gay. This refrain is a standard trope for the LGBT movement, but that's simply because it's true.

Finally, be sure to remember his wife, Coretta Scott King, who was a tireless advocate for fairness and justice for LGBT folks, including marriage equality.

On a different note, over the weekend, I found two of my bear friends are splitting up. They've been a couple for years and years.

No, they're not becoming single - they're still a couple. One of them is Canadian, and his visa is not being renewed. He has to move out of the country for a year.

Now, they're making plans to make this work. The one who's a US citizen is planning regular visits to Canada, and the one who's leaving is lucky that his job is willing to hold his position while he's gone.

Still, this situation is so unfair. Imagine having to unsettle your entire life for a year, moving away from your job and partner, your friends and home.

If they could get married, this wouldn't happen. Every day, more than 36,000 lesbian and gay families are impacted every day by discriminatory immigration policies.

A simpler, and much more likely to be timely solution, is simply immigration reform that includes LGBT families. For more information about this important issue and information on how to take action, go to Immigration Equality's page about the Uniting American Families Act.

It won't help them now, but it could be a big help for them - and thousands of others - in the future. You never know what's going to happen in life. Who knows, immigration reform may critically change your life, if not directly then through your friends and family.

"Invictus," Describing the Unconquerable Nelson Mandela and the Uneatable Game of Rugby

Over the weekend, I went with some rugby buddies to see the movie "Invictus," which details a little-known story of peace advocate and apartheid-ender Nelson Mandela and the sport of rugby. (This does relate to LGBT equality, so bear with me.)

In the movie, we see how newly-elected South African President Nelson Mandela (played by narratoriffic Morgan Freeman) uses his influence to prevent the country's national rugby team, the Springboks, from being dissolved and reformed. Some people considered it a symbol of white oppression, but Mandela saw it instead as an opportunity for bridging racial chasms. He worked with the rugby team's captain, Francois Pienaar (played by a beefy Matt Damon) to turn the team from a symbol of racial division into one of unification and solidarity. That year the Springboks then went from having a sub-par record to winning the rugby World Cup ... in overtime no less. It's the most cliched of sports tales, except for the fact that it's completely true.

There are two important things for people involved in the equality movement to take away from this movie.

First, it's that rugby is a great, inclusive game. It's a super sport for all people, with different types of positions within a team for all body types and levels of athleticism: tall, short, fast, strong, skinny, fat, whatever.

North Carolina has two officially gay rugby teams - i.e., they're predominately LGBT, though each has a straight member (not intentionally token, just coincidentally) - the Kodiaks, here in the Triangle, and the Royals, up in Charlotte. Both of them are members of IGRAB, the International Gay Rugby Association and Board.

Even outside of the officially-gay teams, though, rugby culture is generally very gay-friendly. For example, the Kodiaks always practice and play with Eno River Rage and the Eno Men's team. Rugby is incredibly butch and it's incredibly gay, in ways that overlap and in ways that are totally different. It's so intrinsically both that it's that it's transcendent. If you've always wanted to play sports but have been worried about homophobia, rugby is the way to go.

The second, and more important, aspect of the movie are the lessons that Nelson Mandela taught, that solidarity, education, and forgiveness are the greatest strengths in any movement for fairness and justice. After being unjustly imprisoned for 27 years, he eschewed revenge and partisanship and worked with the people who mistreated him.

Ultimately, we, the LGBT community, are all working together towards a common goal, despite individual differences and variations and opinions.

Broader than that, though, we're working for true equality of everyone, including the people working in opposition groups. The idea of eventually coming together with people that teach hatred and push second-class citizenship on us (and some who advocate violence and death) is a hard one to grasp, but as Mandela observes, "Not to forgive is like drinking poison and then hoping it will kill your enemies." LGBT people are discriminated against when we're dehumanized, and we repeat that mistake when we dehumanize those who oppose equality.

Besides, the core of prejudice is ignorance, and we cannot dispel ignorance if we're not willing to talk with others and teach them. Mandela again: "Education is the most powerful weapon which you can use to change the world."

None of this means we shouldn't work against homophobia, just that we should work against homophobia per se and not just the people who are homophobes. In the best of all possible worlds, we'll be changing their hearts and minds, and bringing them around to be pro-equality allies.

What About The Children? National Adoption Month!

My partner and I adopted our son through the foster care system here in North Carolina, so today's blog topic is a big deal to me.

November is National Adoption Month, celebrated throughout the United States in an effort to finalize adoptions from foster care, and to celebrate all adoptive families. (National Adoption Day falls on November 21st this year, the Saturday before Thanksgiving).

This year's theme for National Adoption Month is "Answering the Call - You don't have to be perfect to be a perfect parent."

(The 2009 focus is also more toward the African-American community. A disproportionate amount of kids in the foster care system are racial minorities.)

There've been some really positive legal developments for gay parents in the state recently. Now is a great time for LGBT folks to adopt, and the foster care system is a great place to look for kids who need homes and parents.

Thousands of children in North Carolina enter the foster care system each year, and range in age from infants to 18 years old. All foster children have unique backgrounds, experiences, personalities, strengths, and needs.

The NC foster care system is open to gay parents. (OK, well, technically, they're neither open nor not open.) Your actual experience will depend on any foster care agency you go through and/or the officials in any county DSS (Department of Social Services) that you deal with. We found everyone we interacted with to be extremely positive and supportive of us as a gay male couple looking to adopt - all they cared about was being sure that the kids in need found a good, loving home that could support and care for them.

During November, there are plenty of things you can do to observe National Adoption Month, either as a parent, prospective parent, or someone who has no plans to have children but wants to support adoptive families. Some ideas for this month include:

☼ Write down your family story and add it to a scrapbook.

☼ Contact your local paper about National Adoption Month, and ask them to publish a positive story about adoption.

☼ Contact a children's organization or foster care agency and ask how you can help.

☼ Create your family tree. Complete one about your child's birth family (if information is known) as well as your adoptive family.

☼ If you have one, ask your place of worship to offer a special prayer for children in foster care waiting for adoption.

☼ Watch a movie with an adoption theme.

☼ Donate books about adoption to your local or school library.

See Celebrating National Adoption Month for 30 days of these kind of ideas.

Last time I went bowling with the local gay dads group, I thought it was hilarious that most of the people there had had their children biologically through an ex-wife. Apparently the old-fashioned way of having kids is also the new-fangled way for gay parents!

Still, there are already thousands of children out there who need homes, and foster care and adoption are great ways to form your family.

(And if you're thinking about having kids or are already a parent, the Family Equality Council is a great resource.)

Adoption is a great way to make a positive impact in a kid's life, and it's also an investment in the future for yourself, LGBT folks, the country, and society as a whole.

It's easy to think that you won't be a good parent, but I can guarantee you that having you as a parent will be hundreds of times better than having no parent at all.

Equality in the News August 7th - 14th

Hey everyone. Drop by our table at the 14^th Annual N.C. Gay and Lesbian Film Festival, which starts today in Durham.

In the State …

The Associated Press released its review of the year in the N.C. legislature, mentioning the School Violence Prevention and Healthy Youth Acts.

Ian Palmquist, of Equality NC, issued our own “year in review” as well.

Last week was “Family Week” in Provincetown, MA – advertised as “the largest national gathering of LGBT families and their friends in the United States.” Read a review of the town-guest relationship – including comments from a Greensboro, NC family.

Indyweek.com proclaims that the annual N.C. Gay and Lesbian Film Festival is something for us all to get excited about, not just the organizers. "We always try to be cutting edge," says Carl, senior director of the Carolina Theatre, "but this year we hit the jackpot."

In the Nation …

At Salon.com N.C. blogger Pam Spaulding gives a detailed and thoughtful commentary on "At the Intersection: Race, Sexuality, and Gender," a comprehensive report released this week by the the Human Rights Campaign Foundation. It is a must read for anyone hoping for coalition building beyond the boundaries of race, sexuality, and religion.

To read the original HRC report in pdf, click here.

“Are Black people really homophobic?” bluntly asks columnist Mary C. Curtis in Politics Daily. Answer: It’s really much more complicated than that.

The American Bar Association has approved a resolution to repeal the section of DOMA that prevents same-sex married couples from receiving federal benefits. Read more from Edge.

For a great summary on this bill, check out this piece from the CCH Aspen Publishers Technical Answer Group.

Equality California has announced that, after months of research and consultation with experts and grassroots activists, they will are now working towards an initiative FOR marriage equality in the 2012 election. They believe that a 2010 campaign is not likely to succeed for a host of reasons. All Headline News covers the controversy over this approach. Check out Equality California's full plan to win.

Dice Equality California que se debe posponer la lucha por el matrimonio gay hasta el año 2012. ¿Porque? Reuters América Latina tiene la respuesta.

Out in the World

The second ever gay rights march in Mumbai is planned to take place today and tomorrow. “There is a need for the gay community to find an identity that is connected to Indian culture, said Pallav Patankar, a trustee with the Humsafar Trust, a community-based organization. “Our homosexuality is not about being Western. We’re trying to find our own path.” Read more from the N.Y. Times.

That’s all for this week – hope it got you thinking!